How to Overcome the Confidence Gap and Land Your Dream Job
By Jody Bell
As a young woman studying business in college, there is a statistic that floats around my head diminishing my confidence every day.
8.1% of Fortune 500 companies are led by women.
My freshman year this statistic led to sweaty palms and a constant nagging in my head saying that I’ll never achieve my dream of leading a successful company. It led to nights of over-studying and feeling like I need a 100% on every exam just to be taken seriously as a leader in business. It led to passive discussions in internships/classes because I didn’t even have the confidence to share my thoughts.
And now, as a junior in college, I read this statistic and feel nothing but empowered and challenged.
Yes, the truth of the matter is that women must work harder to receive the same treatment, salary, and jobs, as men. But, if we shy away from this fact, the young generation of women that follow us will have the same lack of representation that scares many from following their dreams. It is the responsibility of women to be confident enough to reject this statistic and use it as a source of motivation and confidence as opposed to a big red sign saying, “you’ll never be part of the 8.1%.”
But how do you do this? The truth is, it all has to do with your perception of yourself ‒ you must be so unabashedly confident that no one in the room could bother to doubt you when you open your mouth. Researchers have even noted the correlation that confidence has on perception, and similarly found that there is a confidence gap between men and women.
Obviously, this degree of confidence doesn't sprout overnight ‒ for me it took years of deliberately changing my actions and stepping out of my comfort zone. That being said, you have something I don’t have: a cheat sheet for confidence.
I’ve put together my top tips that led to my professional confidence so that you could believe in yourself so we, as women, can change that 8.1%.
1. Be hyper aware of your inner voice
We all have an inner voice that will share its thoughts whether we like it or not.
For me, it was this voice that led to my professional doubts and anxiety. Whether it was overthinking how I write an email, ignoring questions for fear of being perceived as “stupid”, or avoiding opportunities all together. I tried so hard to silence this voice and to simply have some quiet in my head. But I couldn’t, and every time I tried to get rid of this inner voice, it came back.
It took me a long time to realize that this inner voice is subconscious and part of us ‒ we can’t just get rid of it. I had to change my perspective and realize that this inner narration is not doomed, it is simply a manifestation of our doubts ‒ and it also contributes to these doubts.
Once you purposefully fight to change the narration of this inner voice, you will notice a difference. Every time you feel doubtful of yourself, say an affirmation that contradicts whatever this voice is telling you. For me, I would literally stand in front of the mirror telling myself that I was capable, intelligent, resilient, and a leader, until my inner voice said the same thing.
2. Purposefully step out of your comfort zone
I remember sitting in my first Corporate Finance class ‒ I had a pressing question that I desperately wanted answered. Yet, I was so intimidated by the sea of male students who looked nothing like me, and that circling “8.1%” statistic, that my leg was nervously shaking under the table, and I failed to speak up. After emailing my professor the question after class, he responded with a beaming answer and proceeded to give an entire lecture inspired by my question for the next class.
Oftentimes women are so limited by their own perception of themselves that they stay restrained by their comfort zone. We are so afraid of trying a new task, speaking up, or taking on a project, simply because of preconceived notions of our ability. Most of the time, these notions are incorrect ‒ just simple mind games that your brain plays when you aren’t confident and fear your own failure.
However, what if you’re secretly amazing at a certain task that you’ve been shying away from for years? What if that comment you failed to mention during class, or a meeting, would have changed the trajectory of the conversation and lead to other insights? You’re never going to know what you’re truly capable of if you’re so barred by your lack of confidence that you assume you’re bad at something.
3. Admit to your mistakes with action
When you start to step out of your comfort zone, you will inevitably make mistakes.
These mistakes are okay ‒ you’re most likely trying new things that your lack of confidence had previously barred you from doing. That being said, the line between displaying confidence and not remaining humble is a fine one.
When you find yourself making a mistake, ensure you are empathetic and forgiving of yourself through understanding that these are most likely new experiences. Similarly, ensure you are apologizing to your management in a way that is not personal ‒ you are not a bad employee/intern/student for making a mistake, so don’t apologize as such.
Instead, pinpoint what went wrong, and discuss how your approach next time will address this issue. This way, you have a clear strategy to improve on, and you’re communicating this to your supervisor without diminishing yourself.
Whether you’re currently a student, intern, or already employed, these tips remain relevant. Building confidence does not happen overnight ‒ and changing the 8.1% statistic won’t change overnight either. If you need any help or support on any of the tips mentioned here, know there are thousands of online resources intended to build confidence ‒ plus there are plenty of online classes such as Girls With Impact that allow you to build confidence without even realizing it!
We as women need to commit ourselves to changing our perception of ourselves and slowly reaching the levels of representation needed to close the confidence gap that many women fight with until adulthood.
Jody Bell, 19, is Girls With Impact’s Chief Editor and a program graduate from Greenwich High School. Girls With Impact is the nation’s only online, business and leadership program for girls 12-21, turning them into tomorrow’s business leaders and innovators.