5 Ways to Fill Your Valentine’s Day With Love
By Jody Bell
Growing up I hated Valentine’s Day.
In my head, it was a day of celebrating your significant other – and as long as I didn’t have one it felt like I was left out of the festivities. I would watch classmates in high school tote around their flowers and heart shaped boxes while my single-self would simply stare bitterly.
It wasn’t until I got to college that I realized that Valentine’s Day isn’t solely about larger-than-life displays of love for your romantic interest. Valentine’s Day is about love – simple as that. Some friends freshman year invited me to a Valentine’s Day celebration – when I got there it was full of pink cupcakes, letters of gratitude, and so much positivity it was bursting out of their dorm room. It was a celebration of love, and suddenly I went from feeling as though February 14th rejected me, to embracing and loving the holiday each and every year since then.
When you’re young, romance often comes and goes with the seasons. Yet, love and Valentine’s Day remains – so learning to embrace love in whatever form it may be in is beautiful.
Here are 5 ways you can redefine Valentine’s Day and celebrate the multitude of forms that love may come in.
1. Have a celebration with friends/family
How often do you tell your close friends you love and appreciate them? I know I probably don’t say it enough!
Friends and family are part of our everyday routine – so we often negligent to show them the appreciation and love that they deserve. For families we have plenty of holidays that encourage displays of love and gratitude, however, for friends, there’s no real universal day of celebration. So why not make Valentine’s Day that day?
Invite your friends over, make love themed snacks, and do some activities that spur gratitude. When my friend group has these celebrations, we’ll do anonymous kudus, make funny PowerPoint presentations about old memories, and watch a corny movie.
The term “Galentine’s Day” is often used for these celebrations – as the concept was derived by women who wanted to reclaim the holiday despite their single status. But, the truth is, Valentine’s day is about limitless love – whoever and wherever that may be found.
2. Limit your social media usage
I remember scrolling through Instagram and seeing post after post of classmates declaring their love for their significant others. Huge teddy bears and red roses were inescapable.
This used to be particularly hard for me – last year I just went through a breakup and despite having a blast with my friends to commemorate the holiday, social media ruined my whole mood. Overthinking about what my ex-partner was doing on the holiday, and comparing my lonesome self to all of my friends in happy relationships was hard. Social media can be an amazing part of your life – but only if you’re in the right headspace. The truth is, social media is entirely fake, and the unrealistic posts of enamored coupes celebrating in larger-than-life fashions may make you feel a bit down.
So if you think scrolling through a bunch of loved-up Instagram posts will only drag down your mood – then don’t go on the app! While that may take some discipline, it’ll keep your spirits up for the day. If you can’t get away from using your social media, try to follow some intentionally positive accounts that promote self-love – one of my favorites is @selfcarewithwall.
3. Practice your favorite self-love ritual – or put some time into making one!
Do you have a self-love ritual?! Mine is a hot cup of mint tea, painting, and listening to the top hits of 2010 (oddly specific — I know.)
Valentine’s Day is about love in general, not just to your partner, friends, and family, but to yourself. Self-love is something that is hard to truly understand – especially at a young age. That being said, if you have a solid self-love ritual you are in control of your mood and outlook - you know that you can do this single activity/routine and your mood will be boosted. While that may sound simple, it’s a pretty powerful feeling.
So, if you don’t already have a ritual (or want to try some new things) jot down some activities you’ve always wanted to try and get going! Valentine’s Day is a great time to do this and nail down some self-love rituals.
4. Journal and reflect on yourself
One of the reasons that self-love can be so complicated is because it isn’t solely a celebration of yourself.
Self-love is also about putting the time in to intentionally reflect and focus on introspection. What are some personal conflicts that you could have handled better? What do you have to work on internally to be the person you aspire to be? What can you do each and every day to work towards being that person?
Personally, while I’m an empathetic person I fail to see conflicts from other people’s opinions. Instead, I overthink the issue, become more grounded in my stance, and usually this will just make the conflict worse. Going forward, I need to step back from conflicts so that I can intentionally try to understand their perspective before continuing the conversation.
This point of criticism is actually just as important to your self-love journey as curling up with a book and your favorite snacks! Journaling is one of the best ways of doing this, and there are hundreds of free prompts and resources out there.
While it doesn’t sound exciting, taking time to yourself to journal and reflect on Valentine’s Day is an act of love and service towards yourself.
5. Write letters to your loved ones
Unable to share love and celebrate with your loved ones in person? Send a cute letter to them!
Whether you’re writing to your friends from high school, parents, or other family members, writing a quick note and expressing your gratitude will lift their spirits. Not only is this a quick and easy thing to do, but you’ll probably feel so much joy afterwards thinking about how happy these letters will make your loved ones feel.
These letters can be incredibly short, just try writing about a favorite memory with them, and what their presence in your life means to you.
These bits of advice are just ideas — the most important thing for you to remember this Valentine’s Day is to love. Love your family, love your friends, and love yourself — despite what social media may tell you, limitless love is the core of Valentine’s Day.
Jody Bell, 20 is Girls With Impact’s Editor in Chief and a program graduate from Greenwich High School. Girls With Impact is the nation’s only online, business and leadership program for girls 14-24, turning them into tomorrow’s leaders, entrepreneurs, and innovators.